{"id":88,"date":"2011-07-17T19:01:38","date_gmt":"2011-07-17T23:01:38","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.lektrikpuke.com\/blog\/?p=88"},"modified":"2011-07-17T19:01:38","modified_gmt":"2011-07-17T23:01:38","slug":"stories-i-tell-to-entertain-the-weak-minded","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lektrikpuke.com\/blog\/2011\/07\/17\/stories-i-tell-to-entertain-the-weak-minded\/","title":{"rendered":"Stories I Tell To Entertain The Weak Minded"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>When left alone with my nephew (he&#8217;s presently 13 years of age) for  long periods of time, I try to entertain him with wild stories and  daydreams.\u00a0 The last time I had one of these &#8220;daydreams&#8221; we were walking  to Day Pond (a six mile trek from our apt).\u00a0 I tell my nephew of a  story I concoct for my brother to explain why my nephew is missing, and  you have to picture me telling this to my younger relative while acting  like I&#8217;m in hysterics, loud sobbing, overcome with guilt, inconsolable  and distraught:<\/p>\n<p>It was terrible. There he was, swimming in the pond, when suddenly he  was surrounded by a school of sharks (or piranha depending on which  version I&#8217;m telling him). Swim for the shore, I yell to him. Swim!!! His  advances are halted by the school of ravenous, fat loving fish, and he  screams for my help. At first, I can think of no way to help him, and  surely my entering the water will only put me in harm&#8217;s way, too, so I  dare not do that. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I see a stick  (picture something about a foot long with the weight, strength and  thickness of a piece of straw) and toss it to him to help him fend off  the fish advances.\u00a0 Unfortunately, it&#8217;s too little, too late, and he  fades, sinks, slides under the water with glug, glug, glug.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>When left alone with my nephew (he&#8217;s presently 13 years of age) for long periods of time, I try to entertain him with wild stories and daydreams.\u00a0 The last time I had one of these &#8220;daydreams&#8221; we were walking to &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/lektrikpuke.com\/blog\/2011\/07\/17\/stories-i-tell-to-entertain-the-weak-minded\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[23],"tags":[100,24,58,102,101,103],"class_list":["post-88","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-off-thoughts-off-as-in-not-quite-right","tag-daydreams","tag-death","tag-kids","tag-piranha","tag-sharks","tag-stories"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lektrikpuke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/88","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lektrikpuke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lektrikpuke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lektrikpuke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lektrikpuke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=88"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lektrikpuke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/88\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":89,"href":"https:\/\/lektrikpuke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/88\/revisions\/89"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lektrikpuke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=88"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lektrikpuke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=88"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lektrikpuke.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=88"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}